Meme's Monograms

I don’t often write about serious things. Actually everything I write is serious, but I try to soften it with a bit of humor. I have been reading about tolerance from two different bloggers and of course there are many more that write about the same subject.

I recently read a news article on the internet that caused me to be quite upset. So upset that I could not sleep. I am not going to mention the article yet and maybe never. The subject matter isn’t new. It is probably in the papers or internet daily.

Many news items let readers make comments. This allows for anonymous opinions. I like to read the comments but do not take part.   I learn a lot and get new ideas which either bring me to new conclusions or confirm my own. They can often be heated and quite intolerant. The comments can also show ignorance about the laws of our country.

Each country has its own laws and another country’s laws may seem strange to us. We may not be aware of all of our own country’s laws, but when we engage in an activity or business that has regulations and laws we need to know them and follow them. And if we make a comment or response to something that involves a law, we should try to find out if our view corresponds with the current law.

I believe it is the law in the USA that if you have a business and you have consumer transactions, your customers must be dealt with on an equal basis regardless of sex, age, race, ethnicity, nationality, sexual orientation, gender identity and perhaps others. I do not know the exact wording of the law. In other words you must offer the same service to all. I think you could refuse service if the customer were drunk, barefoot or in someway causing a disturbance or a health issue.

Enough with the background information and on to a one-act fictional play-let.

Meme’s Monograms

Meme owns a small business and makes monogrammed handkerchiefs.  All her hankies may have one or two letters on them.  She has a showcase supply of the standard variety that you can immediately purchase.  Or you can ask for a custom hankie which has a bit of extra fancy stitching and costs a bit more.  Meme’s handkerchiefs are well-known and are considered the best in the town although other shops do sell them.

Here comes a customer now.

Meme:  Hello. Welcome to Meme’s Monograms.  How may I help you?

Customer-1:  I want to buy a hankie for a christening.   Our grandson is going to be baptized and I thought a hankie to wipe his brow would be nice.

Meme:  Just dab his brow a bit.  Wouldn’t want to wipe away the holy water. (giggle giggle) And what letter do you want embroidered on this gift of love?

Customer-1:   An A as he will be named Abel.

Meme:  What a fine Christian name.   So thoughtful of him to have written down those commandments.  Thank you so much for your business.

Customer-2:  I want to buy fifty hankies with AA on them.  It is to honor a group of men and women who have served the community and given it many charitable gifts.

Meme:  But of cour$$$e. How $uperb!  And who are these wonderful, caring and worthy folks?

Customer-2:  African-Americans

Meme: OH!  Hmm!  Well I………can offer you the showcase ready-made hankies,  but I do not do custom hankies for…..for certain groups.   I am of the opinion that Africans belong in Africa and Americans belong in America.  The AA hankies seem to be all gone, but you can pick some up next week.  Good Day.

Meme:  Really!!!!!

Meme:  Hello and Welcome to Meme’s Monograms!

Customer-3:  I want a dozen hankies monogrammed with AA.   The Angels Ablooming  youth group will be tap dancing at the church supper for entertainment.  They need to wave their hankies as they tap dance to Breezing Along with Jesus.

Meme:  How sweet.  You can be assured I will take extra special care with the hankies.  Bye Now

Meme sets about doing her monogramming and singing a little tune.  She likes little tunes.

We’re just breezing along with Jesus
Doing as we pleases
Waving a hanky from Meme

We’re just breezing along with Jesus
And if he sneezes
Give him a hanky from Meme

Customer-4:   I would like a customized hanky with AA on it.

Meme:   You can be assured it will be done quickly and easily because A seems to be a popular letter today.  And what does your AA stand for?

Customer-4:   American Atheist

Meme: WHAT?
Customer-4: American Atheist

Meme:  No true American is an Atheist and if they are they have no right to be and I know my rights.  This country was founded on my Christian beliefs and those people better go back to Russia where Stalin and Hitler came from.  Good Day!

Meme:  Dear Jesus.  (fanning herself)  This is no breeze.  It’s a gust.  Make that disgusting!

Customers-5 & 6 enter the store.

Customer-5:   I can’t wait to get our hankies.  Meme does such wonderful work.

Meme: Thank you very very much.  I love making them for all my wonderful customers.  Now, how can I help you girls?

Customer-5:  I am getting married!  And I want to carry one of your marvelous hankies as something new.   My name is Alice so I want an A monogram.  Then I want another A hankie for my fiancée too.  I am so excited.

Meme:  I didn’t know a groom carried something new.  But that is OK.  It is love that matters.  When two people are in love and plan to dedicate their lives to one another, there is nothing that should keep them apart. What God has joined let no man separate.  So beautiful!  So what is you fiancée’s name?  Let me guess.  Alan, Albert, Arthur, Aladdin, Aldo, Aldrich, Alex, Alfred?  Oh now I know!   It is Adam. Of course it is.  Congratulations.

Customer-6:  No, my name is Alicia.

Meme:  (grabbing a hankie and fanning herself) No, I can not make a customized hankie for queers.  It is out of the question. Homosexual activity is a perversion.  It is not normal. It goes against everything I stand for.  Everything my shop stands for.  You can buy a hankie off the shelf, but I will not make a custom monogram for you.  End of stitching.  I mean end of story. Good Day.

Customer -7 enters the store.

Meme:  (sighing)  I know. You want a custom monogrammed hankie with the letter A on it.

Customer-7:   Hey! How did you know?  This is great service.
Meme: And what does your A stand for?

Customer-7:   Asshole

Meme:  Your hankie’s free.  I’ve seen enough of those today.

The End

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